Funniest Joke of All Time...

Hi y'all, I bring you laughs of the silliest degree today. Read to get your dose of peach-free, hilarious sunshine.

I realized a few years ago that all I knew were hilarious, but vulgar jokes that most people don't appreciate. Or so I've been told. Repeatedly. Ugh.

So, I'm constantly looking for good, clean jokes that I can actually tell to people in most places without the risk of being hit by a purse. (It totally happened at the mall when I was an undergrad!)

Readers Digest's site has a great collection of good and clean jokes, funny pictures, and etc.

Here's a Cartoon by Joe Dichiarro that I came across on the site:
I love that comic. I know so many people who would do that if they were able. HA!

Enough, On to the Point:

In their June 2009 issue, they enlisted a group of veteran comics to pick the top 10 jokes on the site.

The Search for America's Funniest Joke began. Reader's Digest Voting Page Here complete with the ten jokes.

Here are my favorites of the list:

Making Sure (My fav!)
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
"I think my friend is dead!" he yells. "What can I do?"
The operator says, "Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead."
There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, "Okay, now what?"

Crime and Punishment
A man, shocked by how his buddy is dressed, asks him, "How long have you been wearing that bra?" The friend replies, "Ever since my wife found it in the glove compartment."

New Lease on Life
In surgery for a heart attack, a middle- aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. "Will I die?" she asks.
God says, "No. You have 30 more years to live."
With 30 years to look forward to, she decides to make the best of it. So since she’s in the hospital, she gets breast implants, liposuction, a tummy tuck, hair transplants, and collagen injections in her lips. She looks great!
The day she’s discharged, she exits the hospital with a swagger, crosses the street, and is immediately hit by an ambulance and killed.
Up in heaven, she sees God. "You said I had 30 more years to live," she complains. "That’s true," says God.
"So what happened?"
God shrugs. "I didn’t recognize you."

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There are seven more on the voting page. Hope this gave you a laugh, and a joke or two you can actually tell to your kids without giving them issues.

Peaches not horrible and evil?
HA! Now that's funny!

Jenn

If you thought these were funny, check out the Laughs! Section of RD here.